The new year is upon us. Typically this season brings with it a potpourri of emotions, gives rise to self-reflection and goal-setting, and most importantly fosters a sense of gratitude deep within my soul for where I have been and where I am going. I feel excitement at the conclusion of my first year in Seattle and look to 2020 with hope. Joy abounds because I was able to spend a beautiful holiday season with my parents, children, grandchildren, and special friends. Anticipation builds as I transition into my second year in the Pacific Northwest were I hope to continue advancing my career, exploring the countryside and hidden gems in Washington, and look forward to continuing to forge new friendships with intention.
I am so grateful for the opportunity to stretch beyond my typical comfort zone. Moving to Seattle caused me to examine who I am at my core and led me to discover I’m stronger and more courageous than I had previously believed. I’ve discovered that I am shamelessly introverted. Walking away from a long career at my former employer, leaving my professional and volunteer network in Arizona, and packing my home up to walk into the unknown took so much emotional energy that I found myself spending quite a bit of alone time to recharge and recenter myself. Leaving behind a life that I spent considerable effort forging from nothing took more of a toll on me than I expected, and required me to sit still often in this last year to settle myself and accept that I am forever changed (in a good way certainly).
I will say this, giving away several truckloads of clothes, shoes, furniture, etc. before the move was just what I needed. The weight of possessions was growing heavy on me. I felt burdened and buried by “stuff”. Being here in Seattle and living in a 1,100 square foot apartment has taught me so much about thriving with less (it feels really good). I feel emancipated from chasing material wealth (which isn’t really about wealth right, it is about proving something to yourself and others, contributing to emotional bankruptcy). I was feeling emotionally numb before my move. Today, I feel renewed and reinvigorated.
The past year, I have spent hundreds of hours alone, sitting in a space of self-reflection and prayer. I have been intentional in reflecting on what it is I truly desire and need for myself. At one point in life I thought I wanted this big life (to be recognized as a leader in the community, to own a big beautiful home, to be able to engage in world-travel to amazing places, etc.). Self-reflection has resulted in me concluding what I truly want more than ever is the opportunity to connect with others in a deep and meaningful way and to be loved unconditionally. Love, joy, and genuine connection are now what I am focused on as my primary goals in life.
One thing I didn’t leave behind with my move is true friendship. I was blessed to spend quality time with many of the people I love in 2019. Several special friends and family members made the trek to Seattle to see my new digs and to explore the city with me. Those were some of the best times I have ever experienced in life. I felt loved and supported by each person who came to see me (thank you all). Additionally, I was able to travel home and to other special places to spend time just hanging out (what joy). In 2020, I am anticipating more special visits and look forward to being a tour-guide and host.
I love connecting. Quiet moments spent contemplating the meaning of life with others is more fulfilling than being able to buy material things. Exploring and examining other cultures in a thoughtful manner (while being courageous and vulnerable) is more important now than it has ever been for me. Connecting with intellectually stimulating individuals in a space that is safe and free from ridicule and judgement can be enriching, challenging, and rewarding, so I am seeking more of that for myself in 2020.
Lately, I watch the news in absolute horror as an increasing number of people move away from connection and love to hatred and divisive behavior. It is my hope that in 2020, I create real opportunity to engage in dialogue with a diverse group of people who have set their own intention of overcoming hatred and advancing love throughout the world. I know it sounds like pie in the sky thinking, but I have witnessed the power of love, it can move mountains and sway those steeped in hatred to change and grow.
My word for 2019 was “intentional”, this year it is “courage”. My wish for you and for myself is that we can walk into 2020 with the courage to love, the courage to be authentic, the courage to be inclusive, and finally to have courage in setting healthy boundaries while endeavoring to be a better person each and every day.
Lead with courage my friend!